Among active-duty military spouses, a 2008 survey by the American Psychiatric Association found that 40 percent believed their husband or wife’s service overseas hurt their own mental health. Approximately 25 percent reported regular problems with sleeplessness, anxiety, and depression.

I found a note I wrote in my journal after spending some time with a group of deployed wives, “The moms with young kids seem worn out. Their kids are winning the battles. Lots of screaming, whining, one little guy was even growling. Lord, give these women the rest they need to face the days ahead.”

Rest is an important and vital activity to God. Even he rested! “And on the seventh day God finished his work that he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all his work that he had done” (Genesis 2:2).

Rest was important enough for God to build it into the schedule for the Israelites on their journey. On the sixth day of each week, God provided enough manna so they did not need to gather it on the Sabbath. This is the plan of a God who cares about his people getting needed rest.

God gave us the model to prepare ahead of time in order to take time to rest. I do not know about you, but the thing that most often robs me of rest is worry. Yet, I read about the provision God made for the Israelites and I ask how can I fret about the future when I know a God who makes such specific ahead-of-time plans?

Quickly write a list of all the things that worry you and rob you of rest. Done? Okay, make that list your prayer list. Ask the Lord to work in each of those situations and to allow you to rest.

Here it is again: grumbling. For the Israelites, it was not the first time and it certainly would not be the last. They sang another verse of “the grumbling in the desert song.” In fact, grumbling became a recurring theme in their journey, like the song that never ends. Even with the miracles God did for them, they continued to question God’s faithfulness.

God’s response to the Israelites is astounding. God did not say, “I heard all this before, so I’m not listening again.” No, he said, “I have heard this before and I see you are still struggling. Let me give you water out of a rock.” He did not reward their grumbling, but he had compassion on them. He understood the exodus out of Egypt had turned their lives upside down and they were in new territory with many uncertainties and questions. God understood their human nature and his mercy prevailed.

On this side of history, it is easy to judge the Israelites until I hear myself singing the second verse of my grumbling song, which is the same as the first. You know what? God understands and his mercy prevails for me as well. Just because I experienced a victory over something last week does not mean I will experience that same victory this week. Israel grumbled because they did not see their problem of thirst as a spiritual problem. I grumble because I do not see many of my daily issues as spiritual problems.

In the book of Philippians, Paul addressed the issue of grumbling when he gave the instructions: “Do all things without grumbling or disputing” (Philippians 2:14). The phrase “all things” means just what it says.

The antidote for grumbling is gratitude. Take a few moments to list things or people for which you are grateful. Choose to sing a song of gratitude today.

Last week, I had one of those “feeling overwhelmed by life” days. It felt like the world was on my shoulders and, like Moses, I felt that all would be lost if my bone-tired arms let down. Do you know such days? Your husband is the one deployed, but you are the one who is battle weary. When you are weary from sleeplessness, anxiety, responsibility, or just hard work, even the smallest thing can quickly escalate to feel like a major battle that could be lost at any moment.

In Exodus 17, the Israelites encountered a frightening threat. This time it was not food or water; it was a live and fully armed enemy. The Amalekites were a group of nomads that roamed the desert and harassed anyone who came near their turf. They were a tough and aggressive force. The only way to defeat such an enemy was with the help of God. Moses standing on a hill as the mediator of God’s divine power is quite a picture. When Moses raised his arms with his staff in hand, the Israelites were in control of the battle, but when Moses’ arms were tired and started to drop, the Amalekites would gain momentum.

There was no magic in Moses’ arms. Ultimately, the battle belonged to the Lord. He brought victory as Moses stood with arms outstretched. But God used others to give physical and spiritual help to Moses in the battle. Aaron and Hur gave support, a term meaning to strengthen somebody else.

We need people who are strong when we are weak. When our personal endurance is in short supply, we need the help and support of others. May I tell you that it is okay to be weak sometime? Allow others to help you during times of weariness.

I am guilty of thinking I have to always be strong for others, that I have to do things for myself, that I must hide my insecurities. These things lead to isolation, loneliness, exhaustion, and defeat. As hard as it is, I am learning to be more vulnerable during my times of weakness. When I felt overwhelmed last week, I sent a text to a friend and asked for prayer. Just now, as I approached writing this waypoint, I received a text from her: “I am praying for you today. As you allow God to fill you with his strength, he will enable you for the moment. Just confront this moment with the resources he places in your hand.”

My friend lives in another city. She does not know the details of my struggle. Yet, she held up my hands through prayer and words of encouragement.

Sister, who is holding up your arms today? Whose arms are you upholding?

How have you experienced help from friends during times of weakness? How can we provide such support for others?

If money were no object, which tasks would you hire out and which ones would you want to do yourself? Such a list will look different for each person. For most of us, money is a limited resource. However, the list you made can be a guide for where to look for a little help. Have you considered some creative ways to make that happen?

If you are a mom, you probably would enjoy having some help with your kids. Fortunately, there are positive activities for your kids such as the Awana youth program, a military chapel youth program like Club Beyond, scouting, youth center sports, and shared co-op childcare. Such activities can benefit your child, and create a little respite time for you. If the father-in-law of Moses were here, he would encourage you to take advantage of such things and enjoy a little time for yourself.

The military also offers assistance in other areas to include help with filing taxes, legal assistance, and career guidance. Counseling is available through military chaplains and Military OneSource. Honestly, there is no reason for you to go through a deployment depending only on your own resources.

We are all different in what we are able to handle, but we are all the same in our need to experience some margin and personal space. We need to take a lesson from Moses who thought it was easier to just do things alone. Yes, sometimes that is easier, but sometimes it is an excuse to try to stay in control of a situation.

The bottom line is if Moses—a called-by-God leader who God often filled with supernatural powers—needed some help, maybe you do too. Moses needed help when his personal resources were not enough to be effective. He needed a process to keep the work and responsibility from backing up and to avoid becoming inefficient. He stayed busy and always had something to do, but he was not doing it in the most efficient manner.

There are many tasks you must do, but you do not have to do everything yourself. Consider taking some time to tap into other resources and set priorities. Moses heeded his father-in-law’s advice and started to take only the most important cases.

What resources are available to you during deployment? How are you using resources available to you?