Whoa! Tearing of garments… pulling hair from head and beard … such strange behavior! What happened to cause this reaction? First, Ezra’s strange behavior was typical of ritual mourning in response to extreme crisis. What was the crisis? A group of concerned leaders reported the gross misconduct that was taking place in the Jewish community. You see, the Jews were to be a separate people, but they had mixed themselves with pagans. The crisis was not about ethnicity or race, but worship and holiness. The disobedience of God’s people was devastating to Ezra. He sat appalled in seemingly helpless frustration.

Let’s get back to the strange behavior. In the Near Eastern culture of Ezra’s day, expressing anguish in an overt and public manner was acceptable. Ezra’s actions communicated the intense emotion and profound sorrow he felt for the condition of his community. Such behavior today would be cause for alarm and reason for a 911 call. Ezra’s unusual exhibition brought into the open the misconduct issue. The people became aware of the situation and gathered in solidarity around Ezra.

I wish we still practiced grief rituals that would rid oneself of such conflict and alert others of the need for solidarity. Perhaps such cultural rituals to deal with traumatic experiences and loss would be beneficial.

Today, in the context of military personnel returning from battle, strange behavior may be an indication of internal conflict. As a spouse, you can be watchful for signs of behavior that alert you to a need for help. Within three months of deployment, is anything preventing your military man from returning to a full and normal life?

Your initial response should not be to criticize your military man and insist he change his new and unacceptable behavior. Keep in mind these actions may be a result of unseen internal conflict. Talk to a trusted professional like a military chaplain if you are not sure how to approach your husband. Chaplains can confidentially give insight into what your husband’s strange behavior means and recommend a solution. You may learn that uncommon behavior by returning troops is very common. Such behavior can indicate a need for help in the readjustment process.

Whom can you intercede in prayer for today? List their names in a journal or on a paper to keep in your handout. Take the time to let them know you are standing with them in solidarity.

Do you recall the posture of Ezra in yesterday’s reading? I do, because it is a posture in which I can be stuck. Ezra said, “I sat appalled.” Other translations of the word appalled include overcome, devastated, or stunned. Bad news, unmet expectations, or disappointing results can paralyze me and I can sit appalled, devastated, stunned, overcome.

The example of Ezra here in Ezra 9:5 provides a model for emotionally paralyzing situations. We see that Ezra allowed himself to feel all the negative emotions that came with bad news, but he did not stay in that dark place. At a set time, he rose and took his emotions to God in prayer. Ezra knelt, bowed his head, and spread out his hands to plead with God for help. His posture communicated need, humility, and submission to God. His position changed from one of sitting on his hands feeling hopeless, to one of falling on his knees feeling hopeful.

Whether it is bad news, or inner struggles, the temptation to sit appalled is real.

What posture do you take when you are discouraged, hear bad news, or are having a bad day? You may sit like Ezra, drape yourself across your bed, or curl up in a fetal position. The posture is only the indicator of the position of your heart. A change in heart normally presents a change in posture.

Look at yourself in the proverbial mirror. When you are in your “appalled” posture, follow the example of Ezra. Allow yourself some time to sit there, take note of the emotions that simmer in this posture, and then make the determination—and it may take all your strength—to stand up. Stand up spiritually in prayer. In making the change to a positive posture, you will begin to see progress.

What is your emotional posture today? Taking note of your emotions, how will you make the determination to stand?

Do you think we remember life by significant moments? The ordinary passes as a blur, but then comes a moment when something happens that changes the trajectory of a day, a year, or a lifetime. A moment is brief, but it can be historic.

The opening words of Ezra 9:8 indicate the significance that can come in a brief moment. As Ezra prayed, he compared the power of one brief moment of God’s favor in contrast to the many years the Jews walked in disobedience. He recognized and acknowledged God’s grace at work enabling them to survive and return to their homeland.

Read Ezra 9:8–9. Packed into a few words you will see a lot of grace shown to the Jewish people. That grace secured their future (given a secure hold), encouraged their hearts (brighten our eyes), extended their hope (grant us a little reviving), renewed their purpose (set up the house of God), and promised their protection (to give us protection in Judea and Jerusalem).

These folks had been in exile so long that they seem to have suffered some disorientation. They struggled to reconcile their identity from before the exile with their identity now that they have returned home. In Ezra’s prayer of confession, he connected the past to the present. He did not sugarcoat the struggles of the past, but reminded the people that God was with them even in the difficult times. Now, God is still with them to offer fresh courage to do the work of rebuilding the temple and restore worship to their God.

Dear sister, do not discount the significance of a moment. The process of reintegration takes place moment by moment. Give the Lord the moments of your day and trust him to be your security, your hope, your purpose, and your protection.

Ezra 9:8–9 is a picture of God going the extra mile on behalf of the Jewish people. How have you seen God go the extra mile for you? What fresh courage is the Lord giving you for the work ahead?

To review: The Jewish people married those who were members of ungodly, pagan religions. Jewish law prohibited this practice. The disobedience of the people broke Ezra’s heart and he felt the need to confess to God for the sin of the people. You can read the prayer of Ezra in its entirety in Ezra 9:5–15. The moving prayer expresses immense guilt. How much guilt, you ask? Enough to be “mounted up to the heavens.” What a lot of guilt! The Jews consistently tested God’s goodness, compounding their long-standing pattern of guilt.

In my mind, I see Ezra with hair wild and clothes torn. In the dirt, on his knees, his hands outstretched, he looks up to heaven. On his face is an earnest and intense expression. As he pleads with God, the waves of grief for the past sins of his people multiply—wave upon wave—he confesses the cumulative effect of disobedience. The wrongs have mounted over time to create a great burden.

Guilt is a heavy burden and it can weigh down your soul. Confession is a heavy action, but it can relieve a weighty burden.

Reintegration following a deployment may drudge up guilt that can cover a wide spectrum of thoughts and deeds. On one end of the spectrum can be negative words or attitudes that you and your spouse need to confess to the Lord and to each other. On the other end of the spectrum can be things that are not as easy to put behind you. A word of caution: be careful about making confession directly to your spouse. Sometimes this can do more harm than good. Some Christian denominations practice formal confession, while others encourage talking with a trusted counselor or chaplain.

If you feel the need to confess, do not ignore the need, but do it responsibly. Just as God heard Ezra’s prayer of confession, we all can find hope in the promise stated in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

What do you learn about confession from Ezra’s prayer in Ezra 9:6–15? Spend time asking the Lord to reveal anything in your own life about which you need to mourn and for which you need to confess.